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In Too Deep

By Nailah Starks, Dillard University


You’ve got me


in this prison you call passion.

You starve me then tell me you love me

how can you love me and deprive me of all my needs?

Don’t think I mistake your sweat for air, my tears for water, and shame for cloth

I know a mirror reflects my every thought, word, cry…

I know you don’t care.

My nights are filled with memories of scars you’ve left on my chest

days race, glide through my face like the winds of spring.

For a second I think I see a smile...almost.

God is too much of a mystery to tell me when you fell out of love

He taunts me, strangles my angels as punishment for my choosing you

time and time and time and time again.

My first name, your last

you always came first

I last.

We didn’t last.

Had we left it up to chance maybe...nah.

We were always doomed.

I thought I’d take a sip, dip my toe in

never thought I’d fall off the deep end

we’re in the deep end

far too in

in too deep

Don’t you know that I can’t swim?

As I drown in your pool I wonder will you sink or float

You surprise me every time.

About the Author

Nailah Starks is a 20-year old Sophomore English major at Dillard University with a vision to become a successful teacher and writer. Her poetry has been published in the 2019 and 2020 Appelley Rising Stars collection as well as the 2020 Upon Arrival anthology by Eber and Wein Publishing. She also has her own blog, Praying Girl, and her own business, N&N Charms. Nailah's personal mission statement is to educate, influence, transform, and inspire people who face adversity through her writings and personal experiences.

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